What has traditionally been the quietest week for markets is shaping up this year to be one of historic turmoil and triumph for traders.

One trading day after the S&P500 suffered its biggest Christmas Eve rout on record, the index enjoyed its biggest point surge on record adding 116.6 points (as did the Dow Jones, with its historic 1,086 point ascent) and the biggest percentage rebound since the financial crisis, with today's 4.96% jump only the largest since the 7% QE1-driven surge in March of 2009.

There were three other "crazy market statistics" as Bloomberg dubbed them, that defined today's market actions:

  1. All three major U.S. indexes gained at least 4% on Wednesday: That was the first time the market had such a widespread bounce since 2011. Additionally, both the Dow and the S&P came a just hair shy of topping 5% on the day.
  2. The Dow's performance perfectly mirrored its last trading day: on Monday, all 30 Dow member stocks finished in the red. Today, all green. That was the first time that has occurred since 2015 and just the 10th time since 2000.
  3. For the first time on record, more than 500 of the S&P500 stocks finished in the green according to Bloomberg data; specifically 99.8% of stocks advanced (For the purists, there are currently 505 stocks in the S&P 500.) The previous record, at least as far back as 28 years ago, was 99.6 percent in 2011, or 498 stocks out of 500. Just one stock of the 505 closed red: Newmont Mining. Today's other big loser: gold itself, which gave up all earlier as the dollar unexpectedly surged from session lows and is once again just shy of its 2018 highs.